5 Things Nobody Told You About Getting Your Nose Pierced

Do not, I repeat, do not do not do not, ever get your nose pierced.

I’m just playing. That line was for anyone who might think I’m endorsing getting every square inch pierced and tatted up. I’m not. Let’s continue.

I got back to Chicago earlier this year on January 10 after a glorious Christmas break. When my head hit the pillow after the first day of classes, there was a little bit of extra metal attached to it.

I wouldn’t say I’m wild, irresponsible, or impulsive, but when my mind is made up to do something, I…kind of just do it. So my roommate and I set out into the Windy City to do some damage. (Side note: this was our first bonding experience, as we had met 2 days earlier. She probably thought I was wild, irresponsible, and impulsive.) I’d done research to find a safe, clean, reputable place to get it done, and the place I chose had such good reviews they could start handing out stars like candy. That being said, I also really, really didn’t know what I was doing. I didn’t tell my parents, my siblings couldn’t help, and I’m normally just clueless in general. Here are some of the things I learned along the way.

  1. It gon look u-g-l-y for awhile. Red, angry, crusty, yellow, oozing—your nose is trying to fight this new injury, but it’s having a heck of a time doing it. In the pamphlet I got from my piercer, it said emotional stress can cause healing to take up to 40% longer. At first I thought that had to be bogus, but when my infection started to go away on Spring Break, came back as I returned to school, and then leave again as summer started, one has to wonder…
  2. You’re going to get some interesting boogers. What? This blog is about honesty. If you have an L-shaped stud, it stops up quite a bit of that gunk…until it all comes out at once. Eeeeewww.
  3. The pain doesn’t come right away. You’re so hopped up on adrenaline that even as the needle is still there, you look like this:
    Don't let the smile fool you. Terrified. So much terror. All the terror.
    Don’t let the smile fool you. Terrified. So much terror. All the terror.

    The pain didn’t start to hit til I was paying the ridiculously large bill at the counter. I don’t know how else to describe it besides a headache in your nose. If I were to get my nose pierced again (I’m not) I would definitely take an Aspirin or two before the piercing, just to ward off that deep ache :/ It lasts around 24-36 hours, so buckle in.

  4.  You have to pay very close attention to once routine tasks. I got my nose pierced on a Monday evening. Wednesday morning when absentmindedly washing my face, I stood facing the mirror and contemplated the meaning of life. I brought my cleansing wipe down the left side of my nose and immediately yelped in pain. Frozen, I stared at the few millimeters of metal sticking from an odd angle out of my nose. That’s not supposed to look like that. The blood started flowing, and man—I never knew noses could bleed so much when it’s not a nosebleed! Moral of the story: don’t space out. The meaning of life can wait.

A few more photos:

IMG_0345
I will never be able to get a tattoo. The pain wasn’t unbearable, I didn’t cry, etc., etc., but the sheer terror and anxiety of just waiting for him to poke something sharp in my nose was unbearable. He looks like a hooligan, but he’s actually a well-respected, pretty successful entrepreneur who is the manager of his own business. That would’ve been great to know before…It might’ve brought my heart rate down to about 200 and allowed me to think something other than “My mother’s going to kill me.”
About a half hour after the deed was done. In the midst of pain, but pre almost ripping it out of my face. Also pre parents' knowledge of it.
The finished product, about a half hour after the deed was done. In the midst of pain, but pre almost ripping it out of my face. Also pre parents’ knowledge of it.

One of my favorite things about having a piercing on the front of my face is that it is just as versatile (if you want it to be) as ear piercings–meaning you can change up your look to a good extent! Disclaimer: phone screen reflections not included with purchase of hipster glasses. IMG_26605.   As crazy pumped as you probably have been for awhile, nobody cares. Do you want to get your nose pierced? Sweet, go for it. Do you want to keep your nostrils undamaged? Cool, you do you. The big picture is, as excited as you are for it—and as much as you may squeal with your friends once it’s actually done—nobody really cares. It won’t impact tomorrow, you know? In a week, everyone will have forgotten.

….On that note, you’re now an expert. An MS in Nose Piercery. Get out there and impress people with your newfound knowledge. Just kidding. Read #5 again.

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